It's all about me...

It's better to be pissed off than pissed on.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

HNT #20

Ladies and gentleman, I welcome you to what may very well be my last HNT. Quite frankly my creativity seems to hit a brick wall and there are only so many shots of my boobies the world needs to see. So I thought I would introduce you to the "Real Randi" who is full of insecurities and is not at all as glamorous and confident as she pretends to be. I took some "before" shots when I started my second round of Weight Watchers and my sessions with the trainer. I guess now I'm sharing them with you because I feel like a fraud with some of the shots I throw on this blog o'mine. The compliments are like a zillion tiny kisses but sometimes I feel like I don't deserve them. I have a body I despise. A body I talk about a lot here. About dieting, exercise and acceptance. But really, it's this body that makes me wonder if I'll ever have another boyfriend. It makes me cringe to think of what he'll say when I take my clothes off for the first time. This body makes me loathe turning 29 because eventually, if I don't nip this problem in the bud, I won't be able to bounce back as "easily" further down the road. So here I am. The real me. Love it or leave it. And for the record, this is no pity party and it took me some fucking nerves of steel to throw this up so save your shit talking if you thought about it. Sunshine.

25 Comments:

  • At 21:57, Blogger paitl1 said…

    Everyone seems to be making this their final hnt.
    Well, Happy HNT anyways!

     
  • At 22:18, Blogger Southern Sweetheart said…

    I think you look great girl! Congrats on your weight loss and the success you've had thus far. :) HHNT!

     
  • At 22:20, Blogger The Melody Censor said…

    The "Real Randi: is every bit as lovely as the Randi you've presented to us...I know hearing that a million time won't help but it is true...I also struggle with my weight...good luck with your weight loss, but more importantly, good luck with your confidence building. Thanks for your courage!
    S

     
  • At 22:57, Blogger Osbasso said…

    Brave shots on your part, but I hope they're not the last. I don't think that anything you've shown so far is the work of a fraud! You are who you are. And don't buy into the idea that the only way you'll get a boyfriend is if you're young and skinny!

    The real you? I love it!

     
  • At 02:45, Blogger Wenchy said…

    You are great - JUST THE WAY YOU ARE!

     
  • At 03:50, Blogger kitkat said…

    You're gorgeous, girl.

     
  • At 06:09, Blogger Nancy Gurl said…

    The Randi I know is one of the most beautiful people I have ever encountered. She is tall and volumtous--the way women should be.

     
  • At 06:29, Blogger fyrchk said…

    Why did I start singing Vanilla Ice when I hit the "Love it or leave it" line?

    You are brave and beautiful. And you are my idol!

     
  • At 06:37, Blogger Shora said…

    I love what nancy gurl said above. She is so complelety right! You're beautiful sweetie, inside and out. And the furthest thing from a fraud. All those shots were you and each one of them... gorgeous.

    MUAH! Love ya.

    Please don't stop HNT'ing!

     
  • At 06:47, Blogger ceedee said…

    I think you are amazing...it's about time women stop beating themselves up for not living up to an image Hollywood unrealistically sells. If a guy won't date you for the beautiful body you have, he's not even worth your time. LYLAS always. crust

     
  • At 08:00, Blogger Carrie said…

    that's probably all our bodies in completion...we all only show the good stuff....i would NEVER have the balls to be naked.

    GOOD FOR YOU! you're so cute!

     
  • At 09:06, Blogger Itchy said…

    The pictures you've shown us are not fraudulent...they were your boobs, your legs, your shoulders. That's you. And bravo on today's pictures!!!

     
  • At 09:24, Blogger AndyT13 said…

    Pretty nice! Congrats! HHNT!

     
  • At 10:04, Blogger Maine said…

    You know... I finally believe you when you say you live in SoCal. Until today, I figured it might have been a farce.

    Because only somebody in SoCal could look at that body in a mirror and not be happy with it.

     
  • At 10:11, Blogger truckdriver_sefl said…

    Girl I have to say.........I kinda like the REAL you:-}

     
  • At 10:28, Blogger Frankie B said…

    You look great Randi, and I really like the tatt

     
  • At 13:25, Blogger barefoot_mistress said…

    You look fine to me, sweetie, and please dont leave us! Happy HNT

     
  • At 13:53, Blogger exile said…

    randi, why not make a TR-HNT!

    take requests, then shoot the most clever request.

    or just take a shot and the most retarded requests...

     
  • At 15:45, Blogger MB said…

    ceedee and maine- Ditto.

    The problem is we spend our whole life literally being bombarded with images and ideas of "what is sexy" (que Victoria's secret commercial) It is such an effin farce.

    Body image is just that. An image. Beyond feeling "fit" which I think is important, don't worry about what you look like.

    If a guy doesn't want to date you because you have some curves, then that guy is a shallow dumbass. He's been sold on an idea that girlfriends are supposed to look like Tyra Banks and Cindy Crawford.

    It's shallow, it's rude, and it's ridiculous.

    off the soapbox....sorry.

     
  • At 16:19, Blogger BH said…

    Darlin, we ALL struggle with weight. Is anyone ever truly happy with their body? We're constantly bombarded of what is "ideal" and if we look a certain way, people will like us and want to be near us. Well, I've known beautiful people I wouldn't spend a day or an hour with, and I've known people who aren't the typical standard of beauty that I would love to spend every day with. What matters is - Do you like who you are? Not do you like how you look. Do you like who you are? Those are the things we need to work on.

    Big hugs to you for the courage of your shots!

     
  • At 16:34, Blogger babyG said…

    Hey girl,
    I like your post. I also go to WeightWatchers. One thing that helped me was changing the day I weigh-in from tuesday to Friday. This way I have all week to work off the lbs from the weekend. Just keep starting over in the morning as meny times as it takes. It is your body and you can treat it any way you chose. Good Luck and Happy NHT

     
  • At 17:15, Anonymous Tommy Gunn said…

    Real women have curves and real men love those women. You will think what you think after reading all this but just know that not everybody buys into the Madison Avenue version of what the world should look like. You look marvelous just as you are. HHNT and if it's your last so be it,but the world could use a little bit more reality. Think about it.
    TG

     
  • At 17:48, Blogger Jay said…

    lets see more of the ink happy HNT

     
  • At 22:34, Blogger MamaKBear said…

    Girl, I'm with everyone else...You are fabulous just the way you are! I'm bigger than you, and I'm okay with it. Never been tiny, never gonna be!

    I think the real you is just beautiful!

    Happy HNT! :)

     
  • At 06:03, Blogger Jericho said…

    i hope it is not your last... you are real - you are sexy - you are honest - you are beautiful for all these things and more ~HHNT~

     

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